Family Ties
by JillyMcBop
Summary: River has a heartbreaking loss, and she has a heart-to-heart with Amy about it. She feels like she's failed the Doctor... until she tells him about it and he reassures her that he'll always love her, no matter what. Angst, hurt/comfort with a bit of fluff. Set during The Power of Three. River, Amy, Eleven. Rated for a semi-dark theme.
1. Chapter 1

The house was quiet. The Doctor and Rory had gone out to the shops.

"Why don't you two go out, do the shopping, and go out for lunch or somethin'. I dunno, just… have fun, alright?" In all honesty, Amy was just getting tired of the Doctor's hanging around the house all day.

_He just can't handle being domestic, _she thought to herself. An amused smile played around her lips as she watched the Doctor choose an overcoat.

_This cube invasion thing's almost too much for him._

Maybe curiosity _would_ kill this cat. With boredom.

Amy stood in the front doorway and called out a few last words to Rory, such as "Don't let 'im sonic the ATM!". Rory nodded dutifully, and trotted after the Doctor.

"And don't let 'im drive, whatever you do!"

"Gotcha. See you later."

_That Doctor… he's like a big, raggedy giraffe. _

And she loved him for it. After all, he _was_ her imaginary friend come to life. And her son-in-law. And Rory… well, he was her stupid-faced Roman in shining armor. Always.

Closing the door behind her, Amy headed towards the kitchen. Breakfast dishes were waiting to be done, and after that sweeping, and after that… She was distracted from her mental to-do list by a brief flash of light from the living room.

_Hold on, is that…? _A smile crept across her face as she realized what had just happened.

"Hey, River."

"Hello, Mother."

It had been months since Amy had seen her daughter, but she wasn't sure how long it had been since River had seen her. Traveling with the Doctor had completely changed her perspective on time. Sometimes it could be all… wibbly-wobbley.

Amy trotted over to River and they embraced each other fondly. Sometimes, they were Amelia Pond and River Song, traveling the universe, saving the world, flying around with the Doctor in his Tardis through time and space. But other times they were simply Amy and Melody Pond, mother and daughter, bound together with family ties that would never be broken.

After releasing River from her arms, Amy studied her face for a moment. She seemed much older, tired and… sad, than the last time she'd seen her.

"Melody, are you okay?" Amy asked gently. River sighed, swallowed hard and shook her head.

"Mother, there's something I need to tell you." Her voice was shaky. Putting her arm around River's shoulder, Amy guided her to the couch and they sat down together. River took a deep breath and Amy could tell that she was trying to keep it together.

"It's… well, the Doctor and I... we tried, mother. And I lost it." Tears sprang to River's eyes, and she couldn't go on. Amy's heart ached as she realized what her daughter was telling her.

"Oh, River…" She pulled her closer and let her cry on her shoulder. She was always so strong, so, confident. But today she was a sad little girl on the inside, with a broken heart and shattered dreams of being a mum.

Tears came to Amy's eyes. She knew almost exactly how River felt at that moment. She herself was unable to give Rory any more children, as much as she would have loved to. But they had come to terms with that, and in spite of their disappointment, they'd learned to move on. Amy gently told River about it.

"But mother, it's all my fault. This body's too old. Two months along, and I lost our baby." River was struck by another wave of grief. When that had passed, she sat back and stared glumly at the floor, not even bothering to brush away the tears that fell from her cheeks.

"What must he think when he looks at me? He looks so young, and I look so…"

"Stop it. Right now," Amy commanded. Without allowing River to speak a word, she continued.

"First off, don't blame yourself, okay? And second, he is the Doctor. Don't even think for a second that he'll stop loving you. He'll never, ever, leave you. I know that firsthand, alright." Amy's voice grew husky, and she quickly brushed away a falling tear with her finger. She then sighed, and her tone became softer.

"I'm really, really, sorry, River. I know that it hurts. I know what it's like to lose a child." River nodded.

"I know, mother."

A few moments of heavy silence passed. Then River spoke.

"I haven't told him yet." Amy sighed and rubbed her back gently.

"Tell 'im. He's your husband, Melody. If you're hurting, he'll want to make it better." The tears came again to River's eyes, and she brushed them away with her sleeve.

"I know."

River took a deep breath.

"Mother..."

"Mhmm?"

"Thank you."

Amy and River held each other in a tight embrace for several minutes, letting the last tears fall.

They had both seen their share of pain and loss, thanks for the Doctor. But pain and loss had defined them, as much as happiness or love.

"You'll stay until the Doctor gets back, right? You'll tell 'im?" Amy inquired softly. River swallowed, and nodded.

"Yes, mother, I will." Amy smiled sadly.

"You're a good girl, Melody." River took a deep breath and stood up from the couch.

"Right then… I can't sit here stewing all day. Mother, what can I do today?" Amy smiled mischievously, stood up next to her daughter, and turned her in the direction of the kitchen.

"Well, since you're asking…"

_[Thanks for reading. I hope to write another chapter where River talks to the Doctor. So stay tuned!] _


	2. Chapter 2

When the Doctor and Rory got back from shopping, they were surprised, and thrilled, to see River. Their meeting, at least this time, was under much less turbulent circumstances than normal. Doctor noticed right away that River was not her usual, flirty, sparky self. Not today. Something troubled her deeply; he could see it in her eyes. And it worried him.

River couldn't look him in the eye. It hurt too much. Every time she saw his face, all she could think of was how disappointed he would be in her. She was his wife; she was the woman he trusted, and she was the woman he loved. He was a Time Lord who had suffered the loss of so many and so much…

_And I'm just a feeble, crumbling old used-to-be that can't doesn't even work properly, _River thought to herself glumly.

_He should just… move on. Leave me. Find someone that can be who he really deserves._

All along, after the miscarriage she had tried to drown out her own pain by thinking about the Doctor's. Yes, there was a dull ache in the deepest part of her soul, one that made her want to curl up in a dark place and disappear. But that was all that she allowed. Right now, at the foremost of her anguished thoughts was this: _I've failed him. My Doctor. And I'll never, ever forgive myself. _

Supper was a quiet affair, with a bit of light banter between the Doctor, Amy and Rory. Amy was worried about River, and kept on trying to get a good look at her. But she avoided eye contact with anyone. Amy's heart ached deeply for her. But she had done all that she could. What Melody Pond needed right now was a Doctor.

Amy pushed her chair back from the table and tapped Rory's shoulder.

"We need to go watch some telly. Now. Game's on." She motioned with her head towards the living room. Rory glanced up from his plate, slightly bewildered.

"What? There aren't any… oh, right. Telly." It took him a second sometimes, but Rory picked up on Amy's not-so-subtle gestures _most_ of the time.

The Doctor smiled slightly and nodded a silent thank you as Rory and Amy departed. This might be his only chance to have a well-needed heart-to-heart with his wife.

River was staring at the table with a heavyhearted expression. She rested her left hand absently on the table, and the Doctor reached over and gently took it in his own.

"Tell me, River. What is it?" he asked softly. River looked up into his face, and he could see the tears rising in her eyes. She shook her head slowly, as though words were impossible at that moment. Then suddenly she opened up and broken sentences came tumbling out.

"Oh Doctor, I'm so, so sorry. I lost him. Our baby." A few agonizing moments passed, in which all that could be heard was River's muffled sobs. She just couldn't hold it in anymore.

The Doctor swallowed hard. He was shaken to the core at this revelation. Partially because he'd never even thought it was within the realm of possibility that he could be a father again. Partially because he knew he should have been there with her. And partially because he had never even realized the possible implications of their last night together.

_How could I have been so blind?_

The Doctor pushed out his chair and stood behind River's. He gently rubbed her shaking shoulders and tried to think of something to say. But River spoke first.

"It's my fault. I'm sorry, Doctor. You don't deserve this… you deserve better. Go find someone else that's worth your time and energy. I'm too old for…"

"River, stop that, right now." The Doctor's voice had a commanding tone to it, and it made River look up in surprise. Glancing down at the table, the Time Lord bit his lip, and then extended his hand to brush away a damp curl from her face. Hot tears spilled down her cheeks, it was all the Doctor could do to keep them at bay in his own eyes.

"River…. Melody Pond. Don't ever think that I would ever, ever, leave you." River shook her head, and the tears continued to come. She didn't bother to stop them.

The Doctor got up from his chair and stood behind River's. He rested his hands on her trembling shoulders and rubbed them gently.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there… to help you, River. I'm very, very sorry. I wish I could make everything better." It broke his heart to see her in so much pain, and it hurt even more knowing how much she'd been through already. Physically, mentally, emotionally. All because of him.

River sighed and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

"You already have, Doctor." She turned, and tried to smile up at him, to let him know that his words weren't wasted. He tried to smile back at her, but he was too concerned for her to do that yet.

"I'll always hear you, River. Please, tell me when you need me. I want you to be okay." River nodded. Getting up from her chair, she stood beside the Doctor and put her hand on his shoulder. For a moment they gazed into each other's eyes before melting into a tight embrace.

For a while, they just held each other. There were some words from the heart that couldn't be verbalized, but only felt.

River was now reassured of the Doctor's love, despite her physical limitations. And the Doctor saw that he had even more responsibility than he ever realized. Time and space flowed freely through his fingertips, and companions would come and go, but River's love for him… now that was something that stayed. Forever.


End file.
